Emotional intelligence

Social and emotional learning (SEL) is a process in which we gain emotional intelligence, develop empathy for others, and learn problem-solving skills.

Research has shown that those who manage their emotions have better academic performance and fewer problems with discipline, adapting faster to new changes.

Where did the term emotional intelligence come from? In 1990, Peter Saloway (current president of Yale University) co-authored a scientific paper on emotional intelligence that only a few readers read. He described emotional intelligence as the ability to reason with emotions to achieve goals.

Daniel Gowlmann's popular book on emotional intelligence was published in 1995, and the field of social and emotional learning emerged from it all. The Center for Emotional Intelligence has developed a scientific approach to SEL, which is now used in 2,500 schools in different countries.

There are several different models of social and emotional learning based on the theory of emotional intelligence, now let's talk about one of them, RULLER.

RULLER is an abbreviation that means to recognize emotions in oneself and others; understand the causes and consequences of these emotions; call emotions in exact words; express emotions and regulate them. This is an approach, not a program. It's about incorporating the principles of emotional intelligence into everything that happens to you.

Consider one of the tools we can use is the Mood Meter. It is a square, evenly divided into four parts, and has four basic colors. Each color represents a category of mood: red - means anger or frustration; yellow - joy or delight; blue - sadness and despair; green - satisfaction or carefree. The meter helps users identify, label, and regulate their emotions, which is an important step in the development of emotional intelligence. If we closely monitor how emotions affect our actions, we will be able to connect self-awareness and self-regulation. It is important to understand the difference between different emotions and identify them (examples of anger and frustration). A vocabulary of emotions and understanding of the subtleties of each is recommended. There are also exercises for moving from one emotion to another.

A study of emotional life shows that most people are worried now, we have more worries now than ever before. When everything is calm, we do not actively monitor emotions, but when the emotional tsunami approaches, as now, people lose control of emotions. Everyone is easily excited, worried about security and their future. Everyone is looking for a strategy.

If you feel very anxious or stressed, try to see and understand these emotions, define them with precise concepts, understand their cause, understand the consequences and curb it by rationalizing. Always confirm what you or a loved one is feeling. "It's okay to worry, we all go through it" Take a couple of deep breaths and use the method of positive communication with yourself.

All emotions matter. There are no bad emotions, including anxiety. Because if anxiety is considered a bad emotion, then we and our children adopt this way of thinking. You need to accept all emotions and use them wisely.

We should not be "judges of emotions", but only their "researchers".

There is another tool that can be used, it is the activation of "self". think about how you want to be considered a father, leader, or husband, according to this image, develop a strategy. Also, notice what inspires you, and use this "anchor" at a critical emotional state.

It is recommended to conduct emotional checks during the day. "How are you feeling today? What happens to emotions? Ask relatives how their day went, share the emotions that were during the day.

The main data are taken from the site yalemedecine.org

Zoryana Golovata.

Leader of the expert group on cognitive management